Sunday, February 08, 2009


It just occured to me today while watching TV that I hadn't posted a Worst TV shows list for 2009 yet.

It's something I do every year and I just got delayed in posting it, mainly because I was busy with other commitments for most of last month. Also, I must admit it -- I have not been watching a lot of TV lately. Instead I have been steadily growing my DVD collection.

But I was flipping around the channels and just so happened to land on MTV today. So thank you very much, MTV, you gave me plenty of fresh ideas about what shows to include in my Worst List of 2009.

One show that has to take the cake is the pathetic Shot at Love series that featured bisexual Tila Tequila looking for the perfect match, only to have the babe she chose dump her in the final show. Talk about an embarrassing piece of junk TV show that didn't produce true love.

But it seemed to gain an audience, so we peasants wound up getting a sequel series to it: A Double Shot at Love, featuring the adorable Ikki twins -- Vikki and Rikki (pictured). I must admit-- I like the Ikki Twins. They may be a little bit strange, but they definitely seem like a couple of interesting, fun and frisky individuals.

I think these two girls are aces. But their show? Yecch. It's pretty tawdry. You got to see plenty of shots of them sticking their tongues down other girls' throats on the show. Really, that was what the show was about -- an excuse to show girls kissing girls.

Moreover, the show did just a terrible job of producing a "romance". I watched what must have been a replay of the finale today on MTV. In the end both Rikki and Vikki dumped the lesbian contestant on the show. Instead, they both chose the blond surfer dude Trevor. But according to the stupid rules of the show, they both couldn't share Trevor. Trevor had to pick only one Ikki Twin to be his girlfriend.

So he chose Vikki, which made Rikki all upset. I mean really, what the hell was that?! If the show had any pretensions of producing a real romance, they would have allowed both these dames to date Trevor at the same time! Heck, Hugh Hefner has the multiple-girlfriend thing going on. In fact he's dating a couple of twins right now! It could have worked out if Trevor had snagged both of these twins, or these two twins could have worked something out so that Rikki wouldn't go home empty-handed. Instead, this stupid show just turned into another train wreck, another freak show. What a waste. A Double Shot at Love is definitely on my list of Worst of 2009. Definitely.

Right after that show ended came the Brody Jenner reality show Bromance, where Brody is looking for a best male friend, a "bro". And I'm just looking at this and thinking this is the stupidest idea for a show ever.

Choosing a "bro" on a reality TV show -- good grief. If I were Brody Jenner I'd be truly embarrassed. I can't believe Jayde Nicole is dating this idiot.

Let's not even talk about The Hills, which has totally established itself as fakery due to the totally fake Spencer-Heidi relationship. They have a fake marriage, and apparently they're gonna get a fake divorce! Actually, I dunno what is going on with those two. Whatever it is that's going on, you can bet it's totally fake.

Among other shows worthy of getting a shoe thrown at it include Momma's Boys - where these dudes have their girlfriends pass muster with his mother. I mean really, you can't make this kind of stuff up, folks. These bad ideas actually made it to air! I wonder if this show is even going to stay on the air. Probably not. In which case maybe we should take it out of consideration for Worst of 2009.

But really, these shows make previous atrocities like The Two Coreys and The Girls Next Door and Gene Simmons Family Jewels look like Emmy award winners by comparison. I mean, there really isn't a comparison. Those series look like genius compared to some of this reality crap we have been getting this year.

Three more shows getting deserved pans from me are TMZ, Access Hollywood, Entertainment Tonight, and The Insider. Mainly, I'm sick of their celebrity coverage. In the case of The Insider, I'm sick of their focus on fashions these days. These have turned into complete female-oriented shows with an emphasis on whether people are anorexic or not, whether they are fat or not, whether or not they're having babies or getting divorced or married, and all that crap.

I gotta say: if you are a girl and you actually like these shows, then you are a loser. If you're a guy and you like these shows, you're even more of a loser. I gotta say, people who want real entertainment news are better off going to the Web, because you sure won't get any information from these shows.

In the cable news category: aren't people fed up yet with Nancy Grace and her show? Her effort has always been a dis-grace, but ever since Caylee Anthony took over the show it has become completely unwatchable.

And I notice Celebrity Apprentice is coming back, so yes, that show deserves a mention as well. Finally -- uh, is Jerry Springer still on? I guess it is, but I never watch it anymore.

I guess I could go on and on and mention Knight Rider and other crap that is littering TV. Believe me, there is no shortage of bad TV out there. In fact, I am sure that there are some really bad shows out there that I've completely forgotten about -- likely because they were totally forgettable.

There's so much junk out there, especially on the broadcast networks, that I really wonder why President Barack Obama even bothered putting off the much-ballyhooed switch to digital to June 12. If the digital switch had gone ahead on schedule this month, a lot of people at home wouldn't be missing much given all the junk we are getting at the moment.

As I said weeks ago -- my new cable package is truly 257 channels of nothing these days. You would think at least one of these 257 channels would put a decent show on the air!! Right now I am watching World Poker Tour poker on the Game Show Network, and let me tell you, that is sad. When you are reduced to watching poker on TV as your best option for entertainment, that kind of says it all about the state of television these days.

That is all for now.


Anonymous said...

the cbs has the scene...

entertainment news

glenn.aylett said...

Hey, John, you have never encountered the mindrot that commercial television in Britain churns out. We too, particularly on ITV, have an overkill with reality shows such as Paris Hilton's Best British Friend, one of the most worthless shows ever made, Celeb Air and I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here, Z list celebs gooning in a plastic jungle for 3 weeks. Sadly until young women stop watching this dreck, we are saddled with it forever as it's cheap, disposable TV