Monday, March 31, 2008

DAVID ANSEN RETIRES

Well, it is downright scary the number of respected film critics out there who are biting the dust. They are literally dropping like flies these days. Now word is that Newsweek has offered buyouts to tonnes of its staff and David Ansen has accepted the offer, so out he goes.

It makes you wonder about the whole state of film criticism if this is what it's come to, critics leaving newspapers and magazines in droves. That link said that Nathan Lee got the boot from the Village Voice, among other critics.

Well, there's always the Web as an option for these guys, right? Not a good time to be a film critic.

UPDATE: Here's a piece in the NY Times about the state of affairs with all these critics leaving all at once. Why would film freaks even want to buy newspapers if they can't get decent film writing? Good question.

Friday, March 28, 2008

NEWS FROM CHANNEL 5

Been surfing around the Web looking for stuff and came across this at Mark Evanier's website. This is a compilation of opens over the past 60 years for KTLA News at 10 in southern California. I'm quite familiar with KTLA news because we are able to get the channel up here on some of our cable packages. Pretty funny seeing the openings to the 'casts from the Ron Burgundy era of television news in the Seventies (stay classy, San Diego).

Quite a few big names used to work there as you can tell from the clip, including folks like Keith Olbermann, Jann Carl and a few other people. Check it out.


Also, here's part of a KTLA newscast from 1982. Enjoy.

BIG WEEKEND IN SPORTS

Yes, it is the most anticipated weekend on the sports calendar.

That's right, folks. Wrestlemania is here again!

And you thought I was going to say "baseball is back". Right. Who can tell the difference between one juiced-up exhibition versus another these days. (Although technically, baseball's opening day already took place, over in Japan. But nobody on this side of the world was awake enough to see it.)

NEWSIES BAILING ON AL-JAZEERA

I don't know about you but I think it is a sure sign of chaos at any news organization when a whole ton of staff people are bailing out of the operation all at once. The latest "dungeon" operation to talk about is Al-Jazeera's English service as something like 15 people have quit.

One of the people who left is Dave Marash, ex-ABC News, who when this channel first launched had been raving about how great it was going to be. Well, he's up and quit, and it's apparently because he's fed up with the anti-Americanism rampant at the network. And this isn't the Arabs at the network he's talking about, it's the bleeping Brits there exhibiting this attitude!

Meanwhile, respected interviewer/Brit David Frost is still there at the network, saying things are just fine for him. I'm sure they are, the guy's being paid a ton of money to be there. Still, I think life has got to be bad over there at Al-Jazeera. Nobody wants to watch that boring network, and Americans think the channel is in with all the bad elements of society in the Middle East. They still can't get any decent distribution in the United States because of their terrible reputation. The only way to watch the English service is through the bleeping Internet.

On top of that, journos are finding out the hard way that living in the Middle East is not so great; that Doha, Qatar is too hot and too expensive to live. What can I say? Al-Jazeera is not a fun place for people to be.

SOME PROGRAMMING NOTES FOR THE COMING DAYS

Just wanted to let all 3 of you readers of the CAIRNS BLOG to know that posting here will be lighter than usual in the next few days, as I'll be away from computers and, in general, a busy man. So don't expect much here from Sunday 'til about, say, Friday.

So do not be alarmed, this blog is not dead (unlike other blogs I know about).

Thursday, March 27, 2008

MORE BUNNIES ON THE BRAIN

Oh, nothing, I just wanted to put up a picture of that beautiful Brande Roderick woman who I have such a massive crush on.

And you thought my Playmate crush was on Tiffany Fallon? Well, her too, but I just find Brande to be so cute. As you can tell by the photo, she is clearly dressed for the coming warmer weather. I dunno why I'm obsessed with these Playboy bunnies this week. Probably because I still have Easter on the brain so that is why I am thinking about bunnies and other rabbits.

PIERS F$%^ING WON

It's official: in business jerks rule. Sad but true.

FANBOYS TO PICKET SUPERHERO MOVIE

Did you hear about this? Some die-hard Star Wars fans are mad at the Weinstein Company for its handling of the release of their beloved movie Fanboys, and in protest they are boycotting all Weinstein Company movies including Superhero Movie. I think Superhero Movie is lousy anyway, but in any event protests are being held tomorrow night.

To see what I think of this particular development and its impact on the weekend box office click here to check out my column The Reject Report.

THE AUDIENCE GETS FIRED

Tonight is the finale of the joke season that is Celebrity Apprentice (9:00PM/8 Central on NBC and Global), and it's so freaking obvious that the audience is the big loser in the whole scheme of things. None of the people involved in this show is taking it seriously. Not even Donald Trump. If Trump was serious about making a show about how to get ahead in business, he should have given the boot to the toxic Piers Morgan ages ago. The guy truly is evil and Machiavellian. Then again, there are a lot of places out there where there are Piers-types running the whole show and wreaking havoc, yet they don't ever seem to get the boot. The fact that Piers in the finale of this lousy Celeb Apprentice season really says a lot about the world of business and the type of people involved in it.

It's also a cheap ratings stunt. Trump was so taken by the notion of having Piers in the finale that he ignored the sound advice of both CNBC brains Jim Cramer and Erin Burnett, who both said "fire him". I guess Trump saw the ratings potential of a Piers finale.

Sadly, the ratings have been good, so this train wreck of a series is assured of coming back for another lousy season.

Omarosa apparently comes back for one final faceoff with this dude Piers tonight. Who really cares about that or even wants to see that. And no one wants to see Piers win this thing, either. If Trace Adkins doesn't win The Celebrity Apprentice there will be a riot.

Monday, March 24, 2008

BAD MOVIE MONDAY: SKIDOO

In between doing my tax returns and watching the Britney Spears episode of How I Met Your Mother tonight, I have happened to tune in on the Internet to clips of what has to be one of the most bizarre movies ever made: Skidoo from director Otto Preminger. Holy crow, is this ever a weird movie.

This was Preminger's attempt to get with the LSD trend, and you had a lot of scenes in the movie of people tripping out. What was really bizarre was that all these established actors were in the movie seen doing LSD.

You had Jackie Gleason, Carol Channing, Peter Lawford, Groucho Marx (!!!) and a whole bunch of other, mostly-deceased people in it. (Apparently Carol Channing is still alive, which is a surprise to me because she really is old enough to be dead.)

You can watch the opening portion of the movie at Youtube here, and from there you can find links to see the rest of the movie. Or you can watch the whole thing here. Also, LSD guru Timothy Leary was shown in this trailer for Skidoo and I'm going to post the bizarre trailer here.


Critics were not amused. Here's what Vincent Canby had to say about it in the New York Times -- one of the more polite writeups, as the flick was basically crucified.

This movie was so big a debacle for Paramount Pictures that it was yanked from most theaters just a week after its debut. People in the States were apparently really offended by all the references to drugs, and young people just weren't interested in seeing these old squares Gleason and Groucho doing LSD in a movie. Apparently Preminger himself was so embarrassed by this movie's failure that this movie was sent straight to the vaults. His estate worked hard to keep it out of circulation as well, so over the years we've had no VHS, no DVDs, nothing. But thankfully we have the Internet, the place where long-lost movies and TV shows are rescued from obscurity and shown again. Skidoo is also starting to get shown on some mainstream outlets; seems Turner Classic Movies actually ran the movie late at night not too long ago. It's also been rediscovered at some film festivals as a cult classic, and people have written about it in the press.

Anyway that's Skidoo, which has to rank right up there now as one of the weirdest bad movies I have ever seen. I thought Myra Breckinridge was bizarre-- this takes the cake. Thank you very much, YouTube.

Sunday, March 23, 2008

HAPPY EASTER!


Now some long lost clips from The Bugs Bunny Show! And a link to the website Misce-looney-ous.

Happy Easter, rabbit fans.






And a PSA for the US Constitution.

Saturday, March 22, 2008

AW, NUTS: JERICHO GETS NUKED BY CBS

Well, it really does seem as if shows are starting to get cancelled all over the place. It was confirmed that Bionic Woman got the boot. Now, Jericho has been officially cancelled by CBS. That was the show that was saved by a write-in campaign last year by the fans. Anyway, there were still never enough viewers. There are now fans out there saying cable should rescue the series; I doubt that will happen, though.

People are blaming some of the latest cancellations on the new world order post-writers-strike, with the networks thinking they can get away with commissioning less pilots and putting on more reality/game show junk.

Friday, March 21, 2008

BOND IS BACK AGAIN

I have to say I'm very excited that the James Bond franchise is back in production filming Quantum of Solace. This time, though, the expectations are a lot different. Last time it was all about saving the Bond franchise and introducing the new actor (Daniel Craig). Now, it's about living up to the success of the last one. That's a good position to be in.

Here's my article about the behind-the-scenes goings on with the Bond movie currently in production, with the video courtesy of ReelzChannel.

Thursday, March 20, 2008

PAGESIX.COM GETS THE BOOT

Another defeat for "legacy" media. PageSix.com, the effort of the New York Post to take their popular PageSix page and turn it into a competitor with TMZ and the rest of these places, has been closed down. Here's what Nikki Finke had to say and what Gawker had to say.

Don't even bother visiting what's left of the site, they took the whole thing down today.

I dunno. Isn't there a saturation point to all this gossip nonsense? These days, we are getting wall-to-wall coverage of sleaze, with these pictures circulating these sites of Sex and the City star Kristin Davis photographed getting naked, and The Hills' Audrina Patridge photographed getting naked, plus coverage of whether Lindsay Lohan has a sex tape, and whether Ashley Dupre is getting a recording contract, and, and ---- why aren't people bored and fed up with all this trash and garbage already? I'm bored reading about it. Who really cares about Kristin Davis photos anyway, folks?


In fact, who cares about Kristin Davis, period!? But she is all over so many gossip outlets that it is a joke. So many sites are covering this crap, whether it's TMZ, Gawker, Jossip, Egotastic! or these other sites, that there is really no room for PageSix.com.

Oh, and Britney Spears appears on How I Met Your Mother on Monday. I wonder if she's the "mother." Ha ha ha.

Just my own effort to keep up with the sleaze sites, folks.

BOX OFFICE: WHO CARES

Get it? Who? Horton?! Oh never mind. My predictions are up.

And there are really a whole bunch of other things I need to concentrate on right now, so I must go.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

ARTHUR C. CLARKE DEAD


It's been sad times in movie and literary circles, eh? First it was the death of director Anthony Minghella. Now, Arthur C. Clarke of 2001: A Space Odyssey fame has left the building.

HE & SHE

Thought I would serve up links to an old episode of a sitcom. Here's a link to He & She. a show that ran on CBS way back in 1967 that starred Paula Prentiss and Richard Benjamin. The show seemed similar to the Dick Van Dyke Show which had just gone off the air very recently, as it involved this guy who was a cartoonist whose creation was now a TV show. Jack Cassidy (husband of Shirley Jones) played the star of that show, Jet Man. Here's the link here, here and here. YouTube is great for rescuing long-lost TV shows from the vault, I gotta say.

Having seen the episode, it sure seems like a good show. I think it was probably ahead of its time in a lot of ways. What struck me about the show is the whole look of the thing seemed right out of the Seventies. It seemed like it could have fit right in along with The Mary Tyler Moore Show and sitcoms like that. And keep in mind this is 1967 we were talking about. Also, I notice the show was produced by Talent Associates, the same people responsible for bringing you (drum roll, please) Get Smart.

HEY HEY, PAULA

It also had a great cast with these two real-life-marrieds Richard and Paula on the show, and the good news is the two stars of the show are still alive --unlike, say, the stars of The Lucy Show, Bewitched or even Gilligan's Island. (Jack Cassidy, though, died in a fire years ago.) Richard Benjamin is of course a very funny actor, but I also quite like Paula Prentiss and think she was quite the babe in her day. She was in What's New, Pussycat? and a few other flicks, and generally was way too good an actress to be stuck on TV.

In fact, she was way too cool and too liberated for the TV medium, period. Think about her sitcom contemporaries Barbara Eden, Barbara Feldon, Elizabeth Montgomery, Mary Tyler Moore, Marlo Thomas etcetera, and compare them to Paula Prentiss. What other major female sitcom star from the Sixties has a film resume that includes onscreen nudity credits? (!!!!)

(I notice writer Mark Evanier was one moviegoer impressed by Paula's underdressed appearance in Catch-22. Uh, ahem, ditto.)

Paula was too good for TV, too cool for TV and definitely too sexy as well. You go, girl.

So that's He & She. Actually, the real reason I am posting this is because I am sick and tired of American Idol, Survivor, Moment of Truth and the other reality TV crap littering the screen tonight. We really do need more sitcoms back on TV.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

YET ANOTHER HOUSE ARTICLE


I decided I would once again post another profile of House showrunner David Shore again -- just to remind myself it is possible for Canadians to go and make it big in Hollywood. Just need to figure out the immigration details, first.

Seems he went to law school with two classmates who actually went down to LA as soon as bar exams were over, Lorne Cameron and David Hoselton. Turns out those two have had pretty good screenwriting careers of their own down there in Tinseltown. I notice Cameron and Hoselton wrote the screenplay for the CGI cartoon Over the Hedge. That's definitely cool.

MORE MOVIE REVIEWERS GETTING THE KNIFE

Sad times in the entertainment press, ladies and gentlemen. Noticed they were all morose over the death of director Anthony Minghella, who directed The English Patient, and Truly, Madly, Deeply, and other films. Age 54.

Meanwhile, the ranks of the film critics have thinned considerably. Defamer is reporting there was a bloodbath over at Newsday the other day. Movie editor Pat Wiedenkeller and veteran critics Jan Stuart and Gene Seymour all got bought out, so they're gone.

Speculation is now on about who is next to go at Tribune. The Hot Blog speculates on who else could be ready for the chop. And Risky Biz Blog muses over the future of newspaper critics in midsized markets.

Me, I think this is more downright depressing news about the newspaper business. I ranted about this before and I will rant about it again: I think it's suicidal for these papers to get out of the film review business. These people who run these newspapers think people only read it so they can follow the freaking news, or freaking politics!!! Well, it makes for a depressing, lifeless newspaper if that's all you get. Who will want to actually buy the paper if this is all they see? People will just turn online to get the kind of stuff they want, whether it's movie reviews, coverage of the TV industry, the theater, the world of sports -- you name it.

Of course, film criticism is alive and well on the Internet, that's where the future of the business is. Some people say film criticism is dying, which is nonsense. It isn't dying at all, except at these bleeping newspapers! The complaint from traditionalists, though, is that they think that online reviewers are all idiots. They whine that a lot of online reviews are written by 25-year-olds who don't know what they are talking about. (Check out this typical reaction here.) I think this is a silly elitist attitude, because lots of 25-year olds are geeks about movies.

As well, many online sites are successful because they provide a service that many arthouse-obsessed newspaper critics refuse to provide: populist coverage of mainstream movies. These sites are generally run by people who actually like to go to the movies (unlike some newspaper critics)! So they are better able to give the regular movie fans what they want-- you can't beat that. Maybe that's why these newspapers are in trouble: instead of beefing up their film coverage and adding more diverse and populist voices, they are just cutting staff all the time. Terrible move.

I think there's also more of a future for general entertainment reporting as opposed to film criticism, but again, not necessarily with newspapers. Instead, I see more TV and magazine coverage, not to mention online sites getting in on the act. And of course, BLOGS. But these newspapers seem bent on cost-cutting, concentrating instead on "metro" local news. Sure, this "metro" stuff is important, but it bores and/or depresses the heck out of a lot of people. Cut enough "costs" and readers will walk away completely, that's my prediction.

What's really sad is that daily newspapers are traditionally where the more serious film coverage is done. The Internet is great, but sometimes you really do want something more than the latest superhero-movie coverage. You would think "legacy media" would realize what an advantage they have over online media in its ability to provide that sort of serious perspective. Problem is, too many ashcanned veterans are being replaced by no one. And more and more online sites are devoting themselves to serious coverage of the movies, not just this fanboy-type superhero stuff. Some of these sites are being run by these same critics who'd just been knifed.

What serious feature film fan will want to buy a newspaper, then, if they know that the arts section is being cut or is no longer any good? Not too many of them, that's my opinion.

Monday, March 17, 2008

STILL PLENTY OF NEWS FROM NOWHERE

Well, it's a big day of news from nowhere again, so let's get right to the headlines, shall we?

New York Governor Eliot Spitzer left office today and was replaced by David Paterson.

Also, it was a rocky day on the international markets after the collapse of Bear Stearns, falling under the strain of the subprime mortgage mess that has made life miserable for all kinds of people in the United States. Bear Stearns is being bought out by JP Morgan Chase at a bargain-basement price in an effort to save the US economy.

The Brier, Canada's national curling championships, took place not far from my neighbourhood and Alberta's Kevin Martin was the big winner. Everyone was boohooing here in Manitoba because they were only getting attendances in the 7000-8000 range per draw. Well, try this event in Toronto and see what you'd get, that's my response!! Toronto people wouldn't freaking care at all about the Brier, they are too trendy over there. I'll bet Montreal would be even worse. At least in Winnipeg people still show up for curling! I think the reason more people didn't go had to do with ticket prices. I would have gone, but the prices were too high.

There was a lot of worry about how old the audiences were for this event -- lots of grey-haired-type people showing up.

This weekend's Brier coverage was the end of the line for CBC which had a lock on the finals for so many years. Next year TSN takes over the event completely, just as they are also taking over the whole Grey Cup/CFL package. Also, it was a sad goodbye because so many of the voices of curling on CBC (Don Wittman, Don Chevrier) had passed away recently.

Today is Byelection Day in Canada with four federal contests being held in Liberal-held seats. Lots of speculation that the Liberals will win and then pull the plug on the government, but I think that's the usual press gallery baloney.

Atlanta is still cleaning up from a tornado.

And on TV, Dancing With the Stars (right) is back!!! So is The Bachelor!!! (I have GOT to write a rant about the current state of TV compared to the old days. I mean really, God help all of us real TV fans if this is the best the networks can do. No wonder cable is beating the networks to a pulp.)

That's it for now.

GUESS WHO ELSE HIRED SPITZER'S CALLGIRL? CHARLIE SHEEN

Well, this is too good. Remember when I joked about who might be next to get caught up in this Eliot Spitzer callgirl-ring scandal? And I mentioned Charlie Sheen?!

Well, guess what. Famous international playboy Mr. Sheen, a man notorious for utilizing the services of just about every prostitute in the United States of America (okay, maybe not that many, but certainly a lot), apparently used the services of this same callgirl Ashley Dupre. She was part of a threesome involving Sheen!! Apparently, he dropped $20,000 a session on callgirls in this thing!!! The story here.

WHY AM I NOT SURPRISED????

Expect Charlie Sheen to announce his resignation from his role on Two and a Half Men, soon.

Sunday, March 16, 2008

HEAR A WHO, SAFFRON?


Horton hears $45 million at the box office. Plus, my positive review of The Bank Job. Actually, neither article is all that good; I simply wanted to file a movie review, and my box office column is my regular column anyway and it was kind of a down week.

In addition to movie reviews, I ought to write up reviews of these actresses. Saffron Burrows gets a rave review from me for her role in The Bank Job. The woman is a babe.

(I am way too frisky for my own good this weekend. That's it: no more girls on this blog.)

SELECTION SUNDAY

Check out CBS Sportsline for coverage of the NCAA tournament selections, due in at 6 p.m. EST. That's 3 p.m. Pacific for you folks out west. Click here for the viewable bracket.

Back to NASCAR for me.

Saturday, March 15, 2008

I HEART NAOMI WATTS

I have Naomi Watts on the brain this weekend because she has a new movie out called Funny Games. Now, granted, film critic Jeffrey Lyons called it the worst movie he had seen in years on his show the other day--- but still, Naomi was in it. So I thought I would post a ton of Naomi stuff here; basically, everything Naomi.

The reason is easy: I am a big fan of this actress and think she's the greatest.

I have to be careful. Usually when I write about some famous movie actress, my libido will get in the way and I'll start drooling in print. I can't help it, though. Other guys go crazy over hockey players and football players; I go crazy over actresses. I will try and focus on her talent, which is considerable. I gotta say, Naomi Watts is one of my favorite actresses in Hollywood.

The big reason I like her is that usually the movies Naomi appears in are really, really good. Some actors and actresses just have the knack for appearing in quality stuff, whether it's John Travolta or Tom Cruise, or other people. Naomi Watts has that knack for picking really good scripts to appear in-- unlike, say, Jessica Alba. Watts has appeared in 21 Grams, and King Kong -- movies like that. Now, I can't give an explanation why Funny Games turned out a dud. I guess you can't win them all.

Also, I find it interesting that she's had quite the range on on-screen significant others, whether it be oversized chimps (Kong), or, ahem, girls (Laura Harring in Mulholland Dr.).

Of course, the best thing about Naomi is the fact that she isn't afraid to get down and dirty in her performances. It doesn't matter whether it's a drug movie like 21 Grams, or something like I Heart Huckabees, or Eastern Promises. She's known for taking on dark roles in movies that will give you nightmares.

I loved Naomi's performance in Mulholland Dr.; she just had that winsome, wide-eyed innocent look about her in that flick. "Plucky" is the best word to describe it. A lot of people were comparing her to Doris Day or Sandra Dee or someone like that. She seemed like the girl next door, but then she'd turn around and shock the audience by sexing it up with Laura Harring.
That was her best performance, bar none, although I think she made a very worthy girlfriend for King Kong as well, playing Ann Darrow. She looked like she was having a lot of fun in that role.

Anyway, that's my screed on Naomi Watts, and since she had a movie out I thought I'd put up a post declaring my unrestrained enthusiasm for this gorgeous movie star. Who cares about Scarlett or Cate when Naomi is the real deal.

Now here's plenty more info for you Naomi fans out there.

Here is Naomi's IMDB page.

Websites: The Naomi Watts Experience and also http://naomiwatts.org/.
Next, fun stuff for guys: Naomi's profile at AskMen.com.

Here's some articles about Mulholland Dr. here and here.

Another Naomi profile from Premiere.

Entertainment Weekly on her performance in 21 Grams.

And, uh, King Kong.

That's all for now. (Yes, this blog has turned into MAXIM Magazine again.)

BIG AUTO RACE WEEKEND

Well, life is officially good for race fans. The 12 Hours of Sebring is on as I speak, and the other big race happening is the F1 race tonight, the Australian Grand Prix. Of course, NASCAR has been on for a few weeks now and they are racing at Bristol this weekend.

You know, in spite of the bad news in recent weeks (Toronto open-wheel event cancelled, Paul Tracy losing his ride etc.) and the general chaos in the sport, I am glad to see the auto racing season fully up and running now. You know what I like most about the return of auto racing?

That's easy. Girls.



(NCAA Selection Sunday for college hoops is tomorrow, too, but who cares about that.)

Thursday, March 13, 2008

I HEAR A WHO


Dr. Seuss' Horton Hears a Who! leads the movie predictions for this week at The Reject Report.

It should be playing in your town -- unless you live in Afghanistan. Or Timbuktu.

MORE ON THE LUV GUV SCANDAL


More juicy stuff is coming out about this Eliot Spitzer callgirl scandal.

In fact, we are now seeing him being referred to as the "Love Guv," which is pretty hilarious. Wasn't there a judge named Kimba Wood who was referred to as the Love Judge because of some affair she had. And she had to withdraw her bid to get on the Supreme Court! But that was way different and pretty minor stuff if you ask me. Anyway, Spitzer is out of a job, in legal trouble and the butt of jokes.

The woman who is at the heart of the scandal is 22-year old Ashley Dupre, from New Jersey. Apparently she is the babe Spitzer forked over 5 grand for. Well, I hope it was worth it. 5 grand for any hooker really seems like a total waste of money as far as I am concerned. Expect Dupre to get an offer from Playboy, soon.

In other news, it seems everybody is going to callgirls. Word is out now that the richest guy in England, the Duke of Westminster, also goes to callgirls and was part of this ring. Who the heck else was part of this ring? Charlie Sheen?! Prince Harry?!?! How about Bill Clinton?! This is really a joke.

By the way I put up a picture of Julia Roberts, who of course is not a callgirl but played one in the movies. The oldest profession seems too popular for its own good these days.

UPDATE: Apparently Playboy isn't interested in Ashley Dupre--- but the lowbrow slimebuckets over at Penthouse and Hustler are.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

ON ELIOT SPITZER, A REAL LOSER


You know, for some reason this Eliot Spitzer resignation reminds me a lot of this Marv Albert sportscaster business, where he was dressing up in lingerie and having rough sex with women in Washington D.C. hotel rooms. I guess D.C. is the place to be for all the action these days, eh? Marv Albert got busted for it and so was Spitzer today, resigning from office.

Apparently Spitzer was breaking state laws visiting hookers for six freaking years, while he was Attorney-General and Governor!!! Unbelievable. I hope this guy gets his law license taken away for this nonsense. Would serve him right after the years he spent as attorney-general, ruining the lives of Wall Street traders and sending them to jail.

Here's the question I have. How did this guy Spitzer think he could get away with this? Surely some of these callgirls would have gotten wise and realized this guy was the GOVERNOR. I mean, even people outside New York knew who he was. The guy's been in the news forever. Did he think these callgirls were all stupid?! I'm willing to bet it was one of his callgirl friends who figured out who he was and ratted him out in the end. I hope so.

The other thing I wonder about, too -- why the heck did he want to waste $5,000 on prostitutes? Why didn't he simply stay home and make out with his wife?! Or was the private life at home so bad that he felt he had to waste money on callgirls?! It makes you really wonder when married guys must resort to callgirls instead of getting it on with their wives at home. Is that what marriage is like in America for most guys -- no passion at all? Who needs marriage, then, if you need to see a hooker to get your kicks! And on the flip side, what if you're a woman with a husband who cheats on you in favor of hookers? That is downright insulting, not to mention embarrassing. Get rid of him, already, and find another husband or maybe even a younger man!! Heck, the First Lady of New York could probably do the "cougar" thing and have a good time.
What gets me is that Spitzer's been such a hypocrite about this whole thing. If Spitzer was going around calling for the legalization of prostitution, that's one thing. But he was on his high horse the whole time not only about Wall Street, but against prostitution and these callgirl rings! All the same time he's doing this, here he's giving them his business!!! Reminds me of Jim Bakker, Jimmy Swaggart and all these other guys who were on their moral high horse in public and then went and did something else in private, behind closed doors.

There you have it, another edition of the CAIRNS BLOG gone straight into the deep end.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

CANADIAN TV SHOWS GET RENEWED, CANCELLED

You know, the big story in Canadian TV last week was that the CBC gave the boot to three series: MVP, jPod and Intelligence. And everyone is boohooing about it.

The way I see it is: if these are flops, they deserve to get the boot. Why the heck don't people want to congratulate the CBC on the shows they renewed, especially the new hits like Sophie and The Border? Seems to me that they are doing a lot of things right at the CBC these days as far as developing programming is concerned, and they ought to be commended for it. It's a lot better situation they are in now, as opposed to only a couple of years ago when it seemed like every show they were putting on the air was a freaking flop.

Anyway, here's the story of the CBC moves here.

ELIOT SPITZER COVERAGE

For more live continuing coverage of the prostitution ring scandal engulfing the current sleazy holier-than-thou Governor of New York, check these sites out:

http://www.nytimes.com/
http://www.nypost.com/
http://www.nydailynews.com/
http://www.drudgereport.com/
http://www.wcbs880.com/
http://www.1010wins.com/

Spitzer could possibly resign, soon. Wow. Oh, and there's also a primary in Mississippi but who cares about that today.

Monday, March 10, 2008

10,000 B.C. IS NO BLOCKBUSTER; MOVIEGOERS MAD AS HELL


See my rant about the weekend box office results. Yes, it is a rant. That's the only way to describe it. I'm mad at the movies we are getting right now, and so are the fans.

By the way: 8 per cent at Rotten Tomatoes for 10,000 B.C.; that is embarrassing.

Saturday, March 08, 2008

WINTER STORM FOR EASTERN CANADA AGAIN

Again, I am just posting this to tell myself that life is not so bad where I am now. Right.

WYOMING CAUCUSES ARE ON

I don't think anyone in Wyoming ever thought in a million years that these would count for much in the presidential race when these were scheduled. Usually these Democratic races are over and done with long before this point, but here we are.

Looks like Barack Obama will win these things and blunt Hillary Clinton's recent momentum -- especially after a staffer had to resign after calling Clinton a "monster". Next up is Mississippi which ought to be Obama territory again.

Coverage from http://www.cnn.com/ and http://www.foxnews.com/. I'd blog more, but frankly I'm trying to recuperate from a bad cold, and so I'm quite zonked.

Friday, March 07, 2008

ON PATRICK SWAYZE


It's been a bad week for people with cancer. First Jeff Healey dies, and now Patrick Swayze has pancreatic cancer.

Now all the cancer stories are coming out about Swayze. Some people are blaming his smoking for his cancer and doctors are saying if he doesn't quit smoking he'll die, for sure.

The other thing is there are conflicting reports about how much time Swayze has left. The folks over at the National Enquirer are giving him only five weeks. But there are people out there now claiming the cancer is actually very small and that Swayze is responding well to treatment. Whatever that means.

Didn't the Enquirer run a story a few weeks back claiming Farrah Fawcett was about to die, too? Anyway, we'll see if they are right about Swayze. Let's check back, say, April 22, and see if Swayze is still alive, then we'll all be able to crow about what fools they are over at the Enquirer.

That's it.

Thursday, March 06, 2008

SXSW

Here are links to coverage of the SXSW Film Festival in Austin.

Film School Rejects
/film.
The Movie Blog
Cinematical
Variety
IFC

More to come.

OMAROSA WAS FIRED ON THE APPRENTICE SHOW TONIGHT

Thank GOD. Of course, you already knew that.

RAQUEL WELCH


Since I have already gushed about dinosaur babe Victoria Vetri I thought I ought to give a nod to that queen of the dinosaur movies Raquel Welch (One Million Years B.C.).

I thought what better way than to show some cool videos from YouTube. Check out Raquel, folks. Talk about one of the all-time classic babes.

Here's Raquel on the Dick Cavett Show.




And here's Hannie Caulder.




And here's Kansas City Bomber.




Finally, Raquel does the cavewoman routine on The Muppet Show. Enjoy.


BOX OFFICE PREDICTIONS FOR 10,000 B.C.

And for movies like The Bank Job and others. Click here. Also, I plan to write up a review of The Bank Job as soon as I see it.

Also, stay tuned for links to SXSW Film Festival coverage. (SXSW stands for South by Southwest for you guys who don't know what SXSW means. Anyway there should be plenty of coverage. Me, I'm strapped for cash and can't go.)

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

DON'T TELL ME THERE'S GOING TO BE ANOTHER STRIKE IN HOLLYWOOD

Here we go AGAIN.

Aren't you fed up with these strikes? Just when the folks in Hollywood are getting back up and running after the chaos of the writers strike, the last thing we need is for the actors to disrupt things.

Personally, I hope they do get talks going early, otherwise they may not get any deal done in time.

Incidentally, more evidence that these dinosaurish newspapers are their own worst enemy when trying to compete against the Internet, especially when it comes to film writing. Nikki Finke reporting two film writers and a second string movie reviewer are being booted by the sinking ship that is the LA Times. The LA Times SUCKS.

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

WHEN VICTORIA VETRI RULED THE EARTH

Well, the Blog returns to the deep end tonight as I spread a little more Playmate love to another gorgeous Sixties bunny-rabbit-turned-actress, Victoria Vetri. (Earlier, I saluted redneck-B-movie babe Claudia Jennings.) I love these stories about how these hotties would go from lowly Playmate gigs to careers in the movies or TV. I noticed the movie 10,000 B.C. is due out this week and I thought I would use the occasion to gush over Miss Vetri, who starred in the cult classic When Dinosaurs Ruled the Earth, released by Hammer Films. I believe this was the followup to One Million Years B.C. that starred Raquel Welch.

I know a lot of websites have been going through these caveman movies and harkening back to these hotties that starred in them, like Raquel, Barbara Bach (Caveman), Daryl Hannah and everyone else. They better not leave Victoria out.

Actually, Victoria was an actress and singer for several years, but this role came soon after she gained a bunch of new fans from her appearances in Playboy (as Angela Dorian). Check out some more photos of Victoria, who wore a blonde wig in When Dinosaurs Ruled the Earth and these other movies she was in.



Victoria was actually quite a cool cat. The book Swingin' Chicks of the Sixties profiled a lot of sixties women, and Victoria was in there. So she's officially a Swingin' Chick -- officially cool.

Fun fact for guys about Victoria -- she loves cars. Apparently she owned a Sprite and a Porsche. When she won the title of Playmate of the Year in 1968, Victoria won the coolest Playmate prize ever: a Playboy Pink AMX (shown below). Check out this page about AMX's association with Playboy. Seems aficionados are fascinated by this particular model of car and are suitably impressed. Apparently Victoria gave it a black paint job at some point to fend off all these nutjobs/souvenir hunters who were interested in the car.

For her pictorials Victoria went by the stage name Angela Dorian, named after the doomed ocean liner Angela Doria. I dunno why she wouldn't pose under her real name Victoria Vetri, which frankly is a much more memorable name. I guess she was too embarrassed.

There you have it --- my salute to a gorgeous lady.

SUPER TUESDAY 2


Well, the Texas, Ohio, Rhode Island and Vermont results are coming in and all we know for sure is this: John McCain has won the Republican presidential nomination tonight and Mike Huckabee has conceded the race.

Too close in Texas, though, on the Democratic side while Clinton leads in Ohio.

WINTER STORM WATCH ON FOR TORONTO AGAIN

I'm not missing much not being in Southern Ontario --- I'm not missing much. That's what I keep telling myself.

UPDATE (Wednesday)- And in further Toronto-is-in-the-tank news, the Grand Prix is officially kaput for 2008.

Monday, March 03, 2008

WILL PREMIER ED GET BACK IN?

Just a reminder that around 10PM EST will be live coverage of the Alberta vote. Here are the links to election night coverage:

www.660news.com/
www.cbc.ca/albertavotes2008/
Edmonton Journal -- Alberta Votes
Global Calgary - Alberta Votes
http://www.630ched.com/

Also, here's Colby Cosh with his view of the election and his own voting plans.

I notice CBC going on about how this is a historic election and some of those folks seem to be implying there could be a change of government tonight. Somehow, I doubt it. But we shall see what happens. I'll say this for Alberta, at least they have NHL teams in the playoffs and an open-wheel auto race --unlike Toronto.

(Of course, Manitoba has neither, but I'm not that impressed with Manitoba anyway these days.)

UPDATE: 73 freaking seats for the PCs. Lots of red-faced pundits and media-type people. Gotta love it, unless you're a Liberal.

Sunday, March 02, 2008

WILL FERRELL GETS DUNKED


Semi-Pro is a Semi-Flop. Not good news for Will Ferrell's movie.

I know I should be using this Blog to discuss serious topics like the death of William F. Buckley this week, or the Russian election today, or the Alberta election on Monday, or important Ohio and Texas primaries on Tuesday. Who cares about the box office, right? Well, maybe I should blog more about serious issues that the chattering classes care about, but I'm just not into it. Not this weekend, anyway.

And I still have another review to write.

Saturday, March 01, 2008

BLAME GAME ON IN TORONTO

Last Grand Prix of Toronto rant from me; I promise.

Here's a piece by Norris McDonald trying to figure out who's to blame for the dismal state of affairs with the Grand Prix of Toronto, better known for years as the Molson Indy. He levels blame both at the city and at the owner of the race Kevin Kalkhoven. I dunno if I would blame Kalkhoven so much as I'd blame the city for not keeping the race going. Kalkhoven at least kept the race alive.

But nobody else did very much to keep it going; certainly no other potential local owner stepped up to replace Molson. Sounds like I didn't miss much when I skipped last year's race to go to the bigger, better event in Edmonton: the Toronto race had very little promotion. And McDonald is right on about leveling blame at Mayor David Miller, who's done nothing for the Grand Prix. This is yet another disaster under his watch. Race fans in Toronto have been totally disenfranchised.

But what do I care, I live in Manitoba-- right? That's all from me, I have movie reviews to write.