Friday, September 29, 2006

REALITY TV FADING FAST

For those of you wondering, Survivor: Apartheid Edition is no more. They mixed up the tribes on Thursday's show, so the big racial-segregation experiment--- and ratings stunt of the year--- is over after just a couple of weeks.

In other news Ugly Betty on ABC got a big audience, so I think Brad Garrett, over on FOX with 'Til Death, will be looking for a job pretty soon. Dunno whether Betty will be competition for Survivor in the long run this season. I checked the pilot out a little bit. flipping between channels, and it really isn't that bad. I think this show has a chance to make it because it's the right show for the type of people who usually watch ABC--- a.k.a. The Women's Channel. If you're a boring housewife in middle America then this network is for you. As for who got the boot on Survivor--- really, who cares anymore.

Speaking of ABC, they serve up The Bachelor again this Monday night in a timeslot that usually was reserved for Monday Night Football. Fat chance any guys will watch ABC on Monday night, they're all gonna watch ESPN. This network is hell-bent on driving guys away.

The latest gimmick is that the Bachelor is going to Rome. Last year they went to Paris. Where's this Bachelor show going to go next--- Monaco? Rio? Moscow?! The Antarctic?!?

As you know the last phony relationship that emerged from this crummy show ended shortly after the finale aired. This show is absolutely no good at creating relationships and is a big train wreck, but of course that's why people watch: to see this show self-destruct. Actually, that's the only reason these days. Too many people at home are feeling bad for these contestants who keep on getting robbed and jilted all the time. Who wants to watch a show that makes you feel bad about romance? This show is in big trouble, folks.

On Sunday nights The Amazing Race on CBS is getting KILLED. The reason CBS put this show on Sunday was because they were trying new stuff like Jericho in midweek--- and Jericho is starting to break out and connect with viewers. I think the folks over at CBS feel The Amazing Race is fading quickly and the novelty is wearing off. So they are trying to put the show on Sunday nights to help turn it around and try and lead off a big night of procedurals. Well, The Amazing Race is dragging the whole CBS network down on Sundays. Personally, I think the "family edition" of this show was the turning point for this series. That killed this show right off. Sending these families to these boring towns in America instead of the usual places around the world was supremely stupid. It turned the fans right off. Now they figure they've seen it all from this show and would rather watch the real competition that is the NFL, on the other station.

Then there's America's Next Top Model and I dunno why it's the top show on the CW, because that show is a piece of junk. Just a big fat ego trip for Tyra Banks and these judges. What a waste of time.

The good thing about the fall schedule is that the networks are once again putting on all these dramas and procedurals, and first-rate efforts. I know that there are people out there who hate Vanished, or don't care about Standoff and all these other shows, but let's face facts. Even the worst dreck of this bunch of dramas is better than any reality show. These dramas are actual shows, with an actual EFFORT put into them! You can trash Amanda Peet all you want, but face reality people: what's the better show, Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, or America's Got Talent? I told you so.

NO APPRENTICE

Needless to say I don't miss reality TV, generally. One thing I miss, though, is Thursday nights. It just hasn't been the same ever since the reality one-two punch of Survivor and The Apprentice was broken up. It's just weird tuning in at 9PM and seeing Howie Mandel and the gorgeous suitcase babes on the air instead of Donald Trump. At least The Apprentice was a show you really got worked up about, a show you anticipated with baited breath every week to see what would happen next to the people in the boardroom. You can't say the same about Deal or No Deal.

There's only one reason to watch that show--- for the suitcase babes, and THAT'S IT. At least the suitcase babes are easy on the eyes. But then again, so were the female candidates on The Apprentice. The Donald could sure pick 'em. The difference is these female Apprentice contestants were far more interesting with their scheming and their back-stabbing, and their penchant for embarrassing themselves on TV. Who can forget when Carolyn Kepcher reamed these women out on TV for using sex to get ahead. Classic television. That's why you wanted to watch The Apprentice, to see these fools get cut down a notch by the uptights in charge.

Now that the Donald has fired Carolyn from the Trump organization after last year's embarrassing, jump-the-shark season, who cares anymore about that show, either. Reality television has had it.

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