Sunday, February 27, 2005

CHRIS ROCKS THE OSCARS

Well, tonight is Oscar Night and I plan to tune in, just to see what the reaction is to Chris Rock.

Already a lot of people have written this guy off as host of the Academy Awards because of his um, notoriety. He's best known for swearing on stage during his comedy routines, and he's already made a comment to the press of the "do you see any straight black guys watching the Oscars" variety. To which all these politically correct uptights in Hollywood got all offended and wanted him kicked off the show. Cool off, he was just making a comment, people, and it was pretty funny.

And it's the truth. Most guys DON'T watch the Oscars, or at least, tune in but don't really care much about them. By having Chris Rock as the host, guys may actually watch. I know that's not the most politically correct thing to say, but it could be a good thing to have a show that will actually appeal to people who aren't girls, for a change. But you don't want to say that in public for fear of getting people upset.

Anyway, it seems like Chris Rock is already doomed before he even starts. All these artsy-fartsy critics are sharpening their knives. They seem to want a totally high-brow, boring show hosted by a member of the Hollywood establishment. They are treating Chris Rock as a verbal-wardrobe-malfunction waiting to happen.

Then you have these religious groups who all think Chris Rock is a disgrace and part of the problem in Hollywood, even though it's obvious to me that a lot of people at the Oscars are treating Chris Rock as some sort of leper. But that won't stop these religious-type people from sending their protest letters to the FCC tomorrow.

I generally tune in to the Oscars but I can't say I'm that big a fan of them. Usually the only movies that I like that do well at the Oscars are the ones that clean up all the technical awards. It's funny, but I tend to prefer the low-brow entertainment, of the comedy or action-movie variety. These movies do great at the box office and are really good, most of the time, better than most of the crap you see on TV. But you'll never see the high-brow types praising this stuff. Occasionally you might see Roger Ebert or Leonard Maltin say good things about these movies, but if you read the Canadian papers, our critics tend to have no sense of humor and just trash this stuff. Same with most critics. You never see any of those movies win Oscars, hardly ever.

About the only one that ever did was Rocky, and I'm convinced that was a fluke. Titanic was another fluke: it was a big hit with the public, and deserved to clean up the technical Oscars, but for some reason the high-brow types loved this movie. But I think it should never have won Best Picture because its screenplay was really, really hokey.

I know everyone in Canada will tune in to CTV to see Ben Mulroney on the red carpet gushing over these movie stars but I really don't care about any of the fashions these women wear- that seems to be the obsession of most of the people. Everyone is doing these red-carpet shows so that people can find out what these women are wearing so they can make snap judgments about them, and I couldn't care less. And I don't give a hoot about Jennifer Aniston, either. She'll be a big story whether or not she even shows up, and then if she shows up there will be people who'll be trying to figure out whether or not she's gaining or losing weight, or whether she's anorexic. See, this is the Hollywood media for you. They go nuts over absolutely nothing. So I'll skip watching the red carpet and use the time to go out and buy potato chips or something so I can tune in the rest of the show.

Should be interesting, we'll see how big of a train wreck Chris Rock is with these people, or if Martin Scorsese gets his Oscar. Maybe not.

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